I’m starting my first official project in digital consulting tomorrow and I will be based at the client site. As excited as I had been for the past few weeks knowing this, I freaked out, completely, today, after meeting the clients for the first time.
Fear penetrated my mind.
The fear of uncertainty, fear of failure, fear of unknown, fear of low performance, fear of being alone. I felt really uneasy, uncomfortable and frankly, very afraid. To the point I felt like running away, as my mind tried crafting an ‘escape route’.
Then I started reaching out, to people I work with whom I trust. That includes my direct project manager, my director and even, my biggest boss who’s a partner.
I know writing this honest post will make me vulnerable, but it is this that makes it even more important to do so. Because people don’t talk about the lows enough, compared to their highs.
I feel very blessed right now, that I have these wonderful, amazing people with years of experience, willing to take out time to entertain a 27-year old’s ‘anxiety attack’ before stepping into ‘war-zone’ the next day.
Here, I wish to share some learnings from these chats:
- Be bold & courageous. Be fearless.
- You cannot be not successful. In other words, failure is not in your dictionary.
- Embrace challenges & uncertainty.
- Transform negativity (fear) into positive energy (charge ahead).
- Remove the noise clutter. Drive clarity in your thoughts.
- Don’t be too close to the problem. Take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Go back to the drawing board if you need.
- Structured thinking is key. Take out a paper and break it all down — the ‘I know’s’ and the ‘I don’t know’s’. Make a plan.
- No one knows the best answer. You turn the steering wheel while your team relies on you to give them directions.
- Be confident. Remind yourself that you have the answers in your pocket.
- HAVE FUN along the way.
Each of them tells me how happy they are to see me uncomfortable. They take pride in having fear of uncertainty. Fear promotes growth (if you transform the energies in the right place). It either brings you up or tears you down. In this case, I have been reminded — I’m in exactly where I should be, the right place. This is for me. I will grow positively from this, I will do a good job, and I will succeed.